Malia Obama, a normal 20-year-old person, is trending on Twitter. Why? It could be because a trash tabloid claims she has a social media account in which she mentioned Donald Trump might kind of really suck. It could be because she went on a trip and drank some rosé. It could be because she appears to use a veil of authenticity to legitimize a corrupt administration for her own financial gain. Oh wait, that’s a different First Daughter, my bad!
The Daily Mail ran a big story today on Malia’s alleged “secret” Facebook account full of “anti-Trump messages,” as if anyone were under the impression the Obamas were madly in love with the oversized toddler currently bingeing Fox News in their old house.
The story falls on the heels of yet another bombshell report, this one about Malia wearing a bathing suit while on vacation in Miami. It looks like the combined investigative revelations were just too much for the internet to handle.
I wonder what Ivanka Trump is up to these days?
Hm.
Anyway, it appears Malia Obama, a private citizen and very cool former teen, has done something normal and fun. Malia! How dare you! How could you! Now please, fire all your friends.