Joe Manchin Can't Stop Putting His Body Against Donald Trump's

Horrible senator Joe Manchin, the most useless Democrat in the Senate, is reportedly open to endorsing Donald Trump in 2020, according to Politico:

“I’m open to supporting the person who I think is best for my country and my state,” Manchin said this week from the driver’s seat of his Grand Cherokee, insisting he’s game to work with any president of either party. “If his policies are best, I’ll be right there.”

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I would just like to humbly suggest that Manchin can comfortably assume now there is no way Trump’s policies will be “best.”

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Another extremely creepy revelation from the piece: Manchin cannot stop putting his body against Trump’s:

The president recently mocked Manchin in front of the Senate GOP caucus as trying to hug him all the time — only a slight exaggeration, by Manchin’s telling.

“We just kind of do the man-bump type thing. That’s it. And I think he’s pulling me as much as I’m pulling him,” Manchin said in describing his physical embraces with the president.

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He’s pulling me as much as I’m pulling him. He IS into me.

Except, he isn’t: According to Politico, “Manchin has been frustrated that every time he thinks he’s got the president in a moderate place on immigration or background checks for guns, Trump goes to the right.” Who could have predicted that the Republican president would act like a Republican! Somehow, the persuasive powers of one lone senator who he sometimes hugs have not been enough to pull Trump away from enacting the agenda of his party and the majority in Congress. Trump and Pence have relentlessly hit Manchin for his vote against the GOP tax bill in his Senate race, and Trump even attacked Manchin for voting against Trump-supported policies that he actually voted for. Good pals!

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But Manchin is the ur-No Labels politician. He’s an honorary co-chair of the group itself, and is deeply committed to spouting the bullshit rhetoric of bipartisanship over actual principles. It’s no wonder he thinks giving the president a little squeeze on the reg might dissuade him from being racist or dialing up the culture war on guns.